back on the wagon

well, at least someone still reads this dumb thing ('sup gabi).

it's interesting to look back at college and think about just how young i was. kinda like in college when we usd to look back at all the stupid shit we did in high school. i suppose it's a neverending type of cycle...

i look back and remember all these dumb little philosophies i had about life and the people around me...only to be eventually proven wrong with time. stereotypes and like only go so far...granted some do hold, but they're always the obvious ones that don't really mean much to the world. maybe college is just the time to do that; learn about the world.

i suppose if you've never thought about it and took every new person you meet as a blank slate life would be pretty tedious. with at least a few stereotypes at least you can start somewhere. so many people are so innately against even the word stereotype that i imagine at least someone may be already disappointed in what i just said...but fuck it. i think it's completely natural to guess something about someone without even having talked to them...what we DO have control over, however, is to maintain that it is just a guess instead of letting it progress to an evil assumption.

there's another word to be mad about. sure, people have made assumptions about me that i haven't liked. if they never take the time to truly prove them before believing them, fuck 'em. but then on the other hand some people are so offended sometimes by questions themselves. a long time ago i figured i'd rather invite a personal and perhaps embarrassing question than to let assumptions or even guesses go on in another person's head about me. sure it bothers me sometimes that someone could think something so wrong about me...but usually there's a reason. water under the bridge, move on with a better relationship than before.

but not everyone agrees with me of course. many a time i've been told don't judge when i ask questions and such...but what's wrong with that. sure everyone's entitled to their own opinion, but i do believe in bad people, bad ideas...hell i believe in stupid people and stupid ideas. what would come of not judging someone? peace? right. if someone judges me because of something they don't like, maybe a question or two could help me realize something i'd like to change in myself. of course i could also learn that someone's racist or sexist and realize that maybe we'd both be better off avoiding the subject or each other. and we move on with a better relationship than before.

it actually feels very...foreign to write like this again...it's been a long long time. even hard to find the words...i think i'll try and remedy that.


comin' to your place soon, best be writin' ;)


vroom