party parTY PARTY blob.


music: none, movie in the lounge, loud
volume: distant


so i think last night was quite the fuckin' party. i was really dissappointed that i didn't get more time to do shit to make it a little more intersting, but in the end it seems like costumes and a garbage can full of jungle juice did the trick...

six cartons of juice (fruite punch and orange/cranberry, three each)
five cans of pineapple chunks
about ten sour granny smith apples
two and a half bottles of ginger ale
two bottles of 151

i let the pineapples and apples soak in about a 1:1 ratio of juice and 151...for about an HOUR. as party time closed, i slowly added the rest, and finally added JUST enough ice to make it cold so's not to dilute it too much. thinking abck i probably should've put another load of ice in there about halfway through....oh well. i'll just remember that for next time.

me and dave bought 120 beers up at flair's, a deverage distributor up at 207th that fuckin' ROCKED. 15 bucks for 30 packs of bud. maverick and garrett brought another 36, corey brought 12 natties i think, and white brought 18, so we had close to 190 beers last night...and i think we have 15 left. jungle juice is gone....and someow we've gained 2/3 bottle of scotch, a few ounces of rum, and 2/3 of a fifth of seagram's 7. i think i'll claim that. ALL of that...since i spent 100 bucks and haven't gotten shit back yet. still deciding how i feel about that.

but yeah, as i hoped, people brought people, but not too many people. we took the big table out of the lounge eventually as people were just tripping on it...that made a lot more space....and the place filled. at one point lesser was makin' out with some girl she'd just met on my couch with the door closed...that's crap.....if you're gonna use someone's room fuckin' ask. she had the door closed and i was like, no way. my room's the closest so i guess it's the obvious choice but i was going in and out a lot to grab various things all night. so i sent them to austin's room! and they fuckin' LOCKED the door. that's even more shit. but hey, at least austin gets two lesbians on his futon....hah.

and then there was steiner and eunji....which is absolutely no secret anymore so here it is, for you. at some point steiner (i assume) just jumped on a very drunk eunji and they were goin' at it hardcore on the sofa in our lounge. there were apparently a lotta crotch shots taken as eunji had a thong on under a grass skirt and a coconut bra. i finaly gave in and told them to go in my room but to STAY on the couch and not even touch my bed. they did. but i did find an empty condom wrapper on the ground on my way to bed at dawn.....good form steiner! we still have no idea why he had a condom. a black one, nonetheless.

best costume, me. and by me i mean corey, who dressed up as me. he walked in with a giant fro wig, uptown local sweatshirt, red surfshorts and my clown shoes on. he eventually lost the sweater which was even more apt. i felt so privelaged, i appeared twice at a party. and to top it off, brian white came as a hula girl with a long black wig. he was candace. that bitch (white.) that bitch (candace) actually did show up. i said about...three words to her maybe. maybe two to matt. pain.

i have no idea how many people we had here. i was going to make an attempt to start meeting people but yeah, that didn't happen. i was having enough fun with the peeps i did know. and about halfway through the night i started having LOTSA fun with the muppets :) amanda's little sister becca's in town for the weeeknd and came to our party. for those of you don't know (i'm sure she'll end up reading this at some point), becca's 16 years old and has the rack of a pornstar, and a more than cute face and body to match. either way, she seemed to like hanging with me, and at some point implied that i wouldn't wear her skimpy slut skirt. so i took her challenge and we came into my room and stripped naked and switched costumes.

actually i stripped down my boxers and went outside while she changed into mine; i dont' think she actually woulda' minded but the big muppet would've and i thought it was the 'right' thing to do (yeah yeah, shaddup). so we switched...apparently i look pretty good as a woman. my shoulders are pretty wide so the sleeves were pretty much up my armpits showing off my guns, and the skirt was short enough to JUST cover my package....i had my boxers on but rolled 'em up so you couldn't see them. i kept telling people i had nothing on..which i almost went with but i thought i'd spare the world from seeing more naked jess. especially the way i was dancing :) i eventually found becca's fishnet stockings as well which held the boxers up much better and just made me THAT-MUCH-SEXIER.

i crack myself up.

by the end of the night, when most people left, i FINALLY allowed quarters to happen when i was assured that the party was a success. *sigh*. i wasn't really complaining since i had two beautiful women to cuddle with on a couch not made for it (heh heh, sweet). we finished the pineapples and eventually they dozed off....i had to wake them up when finally everyone else was gone, the movie had stopped, and i was just bored and unable to sleep. so i finally took off the women's clothes and went to sleep just as the sun was coming up......ALONE *sob*. haha. in eric's words i really do just have to seal the deal at some point. i hear on his blog, which i haven't read 'cause i refuse to guess his goddamn password and he won't tell me...fucker. either way he said he loses repect for any woman who's attracted to me because they're just not going to get anywhere. that's rather unfortunate since for the first time in a while i kind of DO wanna get somewhere. funny how nothing ever goes as planned in our lives ;) but really. she's still sixteen. and i thought it was all in good fun on her part as well. or i'm just trying not to get my hopes up ;)

hey becca, gimme a call in two years, heh heh. or....tomorrow?

muppet's gonna kill me. or her. or both.

it was a fun night. got some drink. slapped some ass. well...slapped lots of ass (what else is a plastic pirate's sword for?), grabbed lots of ass too as well. got naked. got dragged. got cuddled. got my package felt up. got freaked. got bit. got nipple pinched....and then got insomnia. i kept waking up all morning...it sucked. i finally got up for a while before noon with a splitting headache...i don't really think it was a hangover since i was close to sober by the time i went to bed....i had headache before the party as well....but yeah i couldn't sleep. slept a bit more after some breakfast and cleaned up a lot with the help of others. thanks guys! and then went to see scary movie three with my sis this evening after sitting around here watching 'goonies' and 'the burbs'. good day. useless! besides the cleaning.

and i still have fake dreads ;) a lotta people were lookin' at me funny. i've decided i'm going to play ultimat elike this from now on. pretty much everything i had on last night...minus the eye liner...taht could get irritating.

i'll blob more if i remember. please, comment any hilarity i forgot :)

to all you punks who missed the party, your loss. you missed one HOT drag queen.



arggg