a small thought on panopticism i've realized. i can't rightfullly create my own, flawless panopticon here for one fundamental reason....let's see if this makes sense. it's a two step argument....that i think works, tell me if not...but i cannot tell everything i think and feel because a lot of it depends on all kinds of secrets and hush hush things i know about people (including friends) that governs a lot about what i think of them/things blah blah. so i can't be completely open. this is where it got interesting for me though....if i think that everything should be known, and panopticism is my key to moral freedom, then why don't i just be completely open? the reason that i can't be is because i'm kind of half-delving into the panopticon and i'm being half-forced into my understadning and belief of morals, and i can't justify hurting my friends, or people i don't know, or betraying their trust. i could do it, but then i would fail to get close to anyone because they would be afraid of my panopticon. if they tell me, they tell the world, so they wouldn't tell me. the world's not ready for a panopticon, and until it is.....i can't have mine.

i value my friends, and i wouldn't let my experiments like this hurt them if i can help it. should i wander into something you'd rather i didn't (pertaining to you), tell me, and it ends. i'll try my hardest to use my best discretion.

yeah....i think too much when i'm supposed to be sleeping, no wonder i'm an insomniac