when i was just a little boy

i really should've just been a fuckin' mechanic. or a carpenter. or an electrician or something. or maybe not. i really don't know what it is about me but all this work around this house is almost FUN. today i was working on fixing our kiln (bigass oven for ceramics for those confused fellows out there). one'a the steel bands that supports the hinges rusted off and buckled the hinge...almost destroying the lid (or more). unfortunately it's not a part that's normally carried by our supplier 'cause it'll go like once in a kiln's life so isami (my old buddy at ceramics hawaii) suggested i just make one. so i went to city mill and got two sheets of 16 gauge sheet metal...i needed 32 inches but the longest they came was 18 so i'm joining them with another plate. you know a stainless steel screw costs 40 cents!? expensive shit. but you need it 'cause at 2500 degrees farenheit everything'll rust, even stainless steel eventually. actually aluminum won't...but it can't stand the heat.

so to do this job i ended up using a chop saw throwing sparks fucking EVERYWHERE and bending the sheet metal to fit around a decagon...and i'm having a lotta fun. power tools are fun. sparks are fun. metal is fun. i wonder if i should just start a business and advertise myself by saying "i'll fix anything". maybe i could start a tv show about it. i could be the next marth fuckin' stewart, baby. only with power tools. maybe that's my calling.


right.


i think the problem is that i just can't end up behind a desk. one thing that really coaxed me into pursuing further education is just talking to a lot of the people i hang out with these days about research. i want to PRODUCE something. i want to invent something. i want to discover something. i don't wan to just do things that've already been blueprinted. i think fixing things works for me because it involves problem solving. gotta find the weak link, fix it, and hopefully strengthen it. my mom's amused by how i approach jobs in this house like i want it to last 20 years whereas she wants it to just look good enough for sale. fixing a buckle in our ceiling (gypsum) i screwed and nailed 20ft. of 2x4's all over the attic above the living room to (hopefully) strengthen a shitty design to keep it from slowly moving. meanwhile my mom's just telling me to cover the crack. couldn't live with myself.

i need a problem to solve. not just a contract.

consulting?

maybe i'll just intermittently work for a year and go back to school for something else. my new interesting idea is to do this gig with natural energy...and if i get bored i'll go get an MBA.


and a house.