happy back from thanksgiving


music: evanescence - hello
volume: 13


baaaack home. a lot warmer here.

i had an awesome time at austin's place (thanks again duder). i slept a shitload, ate more, met some of his friends (very cool), and his family was always lotsa fun....even when mrs. frank was grilling me about anjali ; )

in the first three nights there i slept 11 hrs., 10 hrs., and 11 hrs. austin's mom was very happy to see me rising at 3:30 in the afternoon, heh heh. i guess my body was trying to tell me something? noooooo *shaking head* oh well. it felt nice. and it snowed! that was really cool. prolly like three or four inches or so. if it's going to be cold, it might as well snow, right?

for thanksgiving dinner, family friends came over. i think there were twelve people total and a LOT of food. we made quite a dent in it. i was my usual 'champion slow eater' as austin put it and kept eating...hellbent on cleaning my plate which i overloaded the second time. later in the night for some reason a tube of thing glow sticks was broken out and the other family's youngest, sarah, discovered that they stuck really well in my hair....so i ended up with fifty or sixty glowsticks in my hair....she was an adorable kid, regardless.

got my 'pet fix' satisfied for a bit, too. they have two dogs and two cats. i dearly miss my old cat (put to sleep YEARS ago) and my dog beau back home, so it was nice to play with some furry friends even though they are kind of 'idiots' as austin puts it. they were really cute, and so friendly :)

flights went fine, all went well, got back home and slept for a couple hours and FOUGHT to stay awake. i think i'll be alright for a bit. probably watch alias and go to bed, get up early and start the last push. i feel like i'm ready for it now after wanting to tear my eyes out at the end of tuesday's madness.



how's everyone feelng?

gobble...

happy thanksgiving quickblog


music: Reinhart & Grappelli - Swing from Paris
volume: 15


off off off to cleveland to visit the wonderful frank household. austin's parents are adopting me for the rest of the week :) me and austin'll be back on sunday morning i think? i dunno, i'm in such a funk right now i just wanna get out.

happy thanksgiving!

oh....work update. finished 4/7 of electronics pset, turned it in, finished 5/7 of signals pset, turned it in, finished 23/25 of data structures, turned it in (although i have no idea if my code works 'cause that last two points was my main method...hahahaha), electronics project - badass. turned it in.

i can breath again.



kiss me

home


music: Trance - The Ultimate Collection (about four hours of techno goodness)
volume: 8


back home:

hi: 83 F
lo: 70 F

waves are up on the north shore as well.

.....it's time to get outa' here.



glow

update


music: Lester Young - lester leaps in
volume: 20


-Electronics Project - done
-Signals pset - 15-20 more minutes' work (due 9:30am)
-Electronics pset - 3/7 problems done. estimate 3 more hours (2:40pm)
-data structures pset - hah. i imagine 8 hours should do it...(11am)

i might actually pull this off.....

i'll be updating.


chug

perfection


music: krock - foo fighters - *shrugs*
volume: 13


you ever get so close eto solving a problem that you spend HOURS making it just perfect? like....if you've come this far you might as well take it further. yeah...i usually DON'T do that. somehow, on this project, though....i'm doing it. i had it pretty much finished yesterday...but i found a tiny detail that i'd missed in the assignment that made my circuit just a LITTLE bit wrong (i thought it said < but it said = .... you'd be amazed how much more the equals sign sucks). so that started me on a long chain of calculations, in the process of which i found a couple of ways to improve my circuit....drop capacitance....increase power efficiency....yeah. i'm a dork. so here i am at 10pm with an almost PERFECT circuit. there are still extra steps i could go into...but i don't see the point anymore 'cause there's no way i could get like, more points or anything. but yeah....i usually don't give a shit. i barely even turn in completed problem sets and i spend like four hours shifting my parameters to compensate for approximations.....oh well. it's really pretty now at least :)

now i just gotta' print shit out and write a little bit on my design approach, shouldn't be hard. i'm used to reviewing my train of thought...although usually it's much less 'concrete' than this was. it's odd to build something and know every intricate detail. my circuit has 16 bjt's (bipolar transistors), 11 resistors (two of which were given), and four capacitors. doesn't sound too bad but when you have to finely tune each component to do a certain purpose it because your baby.

reminds me of when i used to do ceramics....sometimes there are things you do that you can't see in the end product...most importantly your curves and thicknesses. even though i was churning out dozens of pots in a week...i remembered every one of them. if i saw a bookcase FULL of pots with just one of mine in there...i could find it. no doubt. i would probably remember appx. when i made it as well. they're my babies :) i really miss that. my house is full of pots 'cause some i just couldn't sell....or...my mom claimed them. she always had dibs on almost anything she wanted...unless it was really expensive and i had a buyer.

either way, i really miss having things like this....that i put so much time in and it's MINE. psets are crap. papers just piss me off. i haven't picked up my guitar much at all this year. i'm not involved in any of my side projects at the moment. nothing to cling to...*sigh* and now my project's done and i get to go back to all the mundane steps of finishing this empty, empty semester.


i want my life back.


or something else to give it to. someone? maybe not right now.




closer

everyone


music: 92.3 krock - sounds like a perfect circle...
volume: 13


man, this weekend has been pretty badass. i probably have the WORST workload i've ever had (term project and THREE psets all due on tuesday)....yet i've been out on thursday, friday, and saturday night this week.....wtf is wrong with me!? what's wrong with me is that i got to see probably everyone i love in nyc that doesn't go to columbia. thursday drew came by 'cause his girlfriend got called back into security at laguardia :) actually the entire plane had to go to security....but either way she was late and he was already on his way so he stopped by for a drink at the tavern and one at 1020.

friday night i went downtown with my sister to a tuscan restaurant...don't remember the name but it was REALLY FUCKIN' GOOD. i hate veal and ricotta meatballs. things melted in your mouth....then we went to see 'love actually' (i've mentioned all this before).

then last night i went to decompression with christian, salty, lightshow, yang, jackie, and steve duncan. i kind of felt like a tourist 'cause i didn't like the music at all....apparently that was a dissappointment from last year. even being a tourist, though, i had a really cool time :) it's really interesting to see what kind of people show up and how they show up. the firedancers were, as expected, badass. i wanna try that shit. we have a fire extinguisher here....and steve gave me some tips (he's done it before). anyone else wanna try it? i also wanna get better at spinning them so i can spin fire too. i used to be able to do it with glowsticks but i hit myself in the balls and chin a few too many times....then got busy and haven't touched 'em in a while. but yeah....good times :) got home at like five am, slept at six, and up by noon.

now i get to work all day and still not finish!

but yeah, saw the sis, drew, christian and yang all in one weekend when i should've been working about 16 hours a day. i love it.

on the plus side, my circuit for my project works BEAUTIFULLY, i just have to do some paper calculations to verify and a 'breif' writeup. signals is about 15 minutes from being done. electronics and data structures hasn't begun yet.



straight ahead 'till morning.

and thanksgiving dinner.



bleeding.

coast


music: Patti LeBelle - Somewhere Over the Rainbow
volume: 14


that music heading must be exposing what a sap i can be sometimes....heh. i'm a sucker for a beautiful female voice, what can i say. i was actually just having a conversation with my sister and her boyfriend, brad. we were talking about heidi klum on conan. i'd never really been attracted to heidi klum until that...but it wasn't 'cause i hadn't seen her or anything. i mean yeah, the girl's hot...but to me it's kind of a stereotypical hot...nice eyes, nice skin, blah blah, shit like that. BUT....then i heard her talking on conan and just kind of melted. for one thing she was mad conan had said that german wasn't a sexy language....and they teased arnold schwarzneger for a while (sp?) and then she just started whispering sweet nothings in german....and that sealed it. even she spoke in german, it was just a beautiful thing to listen to her talk...i don't get it *shrugs*. a cute voice is definitely a plus for me.

what was i talking about....nothin', really. my sis took me to a tuscan restaurant yesterday andi had veal and ricotta meatballs....holy crap. so good. i ate a third of her dinner too :) that was nice. i was about to go and get a slice afterwards if she hadn't fed me more. then we went to see 'love actually'. an extremel quirky movie, but i liked it a lot :) (i'm a sap....). i like all that director's movies though....bridget jones' diary, four weddings and a funeral. they're just really cute and happy. warning, it is a LONG movie.....but if you like cute happy romantic comedies go for it. bring a date and you're golden.

and now i must try and get some work done and figure out how to get to decompression tonight. i'm probably going to go to christian's first for a little prepartying, but then i have to figure out how to get there as well since the L is dead this weekend....i dunno maybe i should just go straight....*sigh*. so much less work done than needs to be done, i love it! gotta call christian and yang...see wassup.

and now that i know how to xterm (thanks austin) i can do my work from here instead at mudd 251.



where is my mind (pixies)

diggin'


music: jack johnoson - traffic in the sky
volume: 8


so i got my account unlocked finally...so i promptly ceased any and all attempts to do my project. i love my life :) we made pasta and put on shrek...and i fell asleep in the middle of it only to be woken up by a knock on the door and the DVD menu of that donkey going "pick me! pick me! pick me!" over and over digging it's way into my disjointed dreams.....weird. i don't really remember the dreams, either.

so then i sat down to figure out wtf i should do tonight. sleep now, work tomorrow. work now, work tomorrow. work now, sleep now....wait that one didn't come up. either way, my stereo went and whigged out (sp?) and i recognized the sound....it's the sound my stereo makes from interference from my cell phone when i either have a call or it's checking for messages periodically. my cell was on silent on the side of my desk...it was drew. he's gonna be in the area. we're gonna go get a drink :) so much for work tonight. ideally i'd like to get lotsa sleep and go to mudd 251 for the 9am-6pm schedule they're open tomorrow :) insane. but it can be done. i'll just tell myself it's like a workday (of course allowing for the possibility that i might have to go back on saturday...sunday? fuck.) the thing about projects like this is it either WORKS or it DOESN'T. not like a paper or a pset where your grade will depend on how much effort you really put into it....like..you can decide. on these things...i get to find out how much i SUCK! woohoo! i mean sure i could slack off and get shit and know i might really suck....OR i could spend 24 hours on it in two days and find out, without a doubt, how much i suck. i don't think i suck, though :) after doing half my circuit and verifying it on paper, i'm pretty confident i can do this.

i'm actually going to make it harder on myself and use a different amplifier configuration (cascode vs. common-collector/common-emitter) because i'm a cocky bastard and i do weird shit like this. it makes some logical sense, but i'm kind of forcing myself to be flexible. i could just use the same amp in the second stage and probably be done a lot faster, but this is more fun!

muahaha




*picks up ball*

press


music: temptations - my girl
volume: 13


on the playlist right now: clapton, blue's traveller, temptations, bangles, astrud gilberto, temptations, macy gray, stevie nicks and billy joel.

an interesting playlist...i think i'll save it.

either way, got a LITTLE bit done today, thanks to scott. made about half of my circuit and devloped more than enough theory to finish it in a reasonable amount of time. i won't get it in tomorrow when it's sorta' due, but i'll definitely have it done by next tuesday. that's gonna be an interesting conversation with my advisor (the professor of this class) tomorrow afternoon. goes something like this: "yeah...i just started last night because i couldn't log into my cisl account to use HSPICE, so i had to use my friend's account and email what i had back to myself to wait for my account to get unlocked...."

boo.

but yeah. most of the confidence i usually have the day before something's due has been restored :) so of course i watched a movie on IFC (sleeping dictionary) in which jessica alba is HOT. i used to think she wasn't all that hot...too young looking...but yeah. she's grown on me. hot hot hot. it was nice to get my mind off this project and the THREE psets i have due on tuesday. and i'm finally getting tired score. i figure i'll get up around nine or ten and get on that project if i can get my account unlocked or get started on one of these psets for one of the classes i'm skipping tomorrow morning :)


echo

not fun


music: dido - take my hand
volume: 12


forgive me for being...dead and/or dead until tuesday night.

or complaining a lot : )



fuck.

fucked


music: alien ant farm - *shrugs*
volume: 5


warning: gratuitous bitching coming your way

well today was a complete FUCK. well..not completely. i'd say...after noon started the fucking. i actually managed to get a COMPLETED signals pset in...i don't think i've turned in ANY complete assignments this semester...in any class :) either way, after that, i was gonna come back and eat some and sleep some and go to mudd251 to do some preliminary stuff on my project. i slept. went to class, which wasn't bad, and then came back to eat, went on an ACIS ticket that SUCKED. some kid with xp home...and it's doing some really weird fuckin' shit...i can't figure out what it's doing. i have to talk to some peeps and the whole time i'm working this kid is watching over my shoulder chattering away. he kind of knew what he was talking about sometimes but i was just getting irritated and couldn't concentrate.

then i come back, fuck around a bit, and finally go out to 251 only to spend OVER an hour trying to log into my cisl account. see...there's this program i need called hspice which is a text based circuit cad program...which is only on the cisl suns. i could log into it fine a few weeks ago...not that i really remember the password but i seriously tried EVERYTHING that fuckin' password could've been...and i couldn't get in. WHAT a FUCKING FUCK. i was planning on being there 'till closing at one am...but yeah...instead i'm here. i can do some paperwork for it that'll make it go a LITTLE faster...but i'm gonna be really crunched for time in the next few days. ...as i was going to be anyway...but i planned out how much time i think i needed and now i've lost FIVE hours of time i could've been working 'cause i DON'T KNOW MY FUCKING PASSWORD. this is a helplessless i just don't know how to handle. grr.... i think i'll eat some ice cream for starters. i feel like el bucho in desperado when he doesn't know the number to the cell phone in his car so they don't kill danny trejo (the knife thrower)...and then they kill trejo.

dude...they're gonna kill trejo. WHAT THE FUCK IS MY PASSWORD!!!!???//1!;A/A/S;DFJA;LSDKJLADSMNKM'P[WE

FUCK.




the ta's been emailed at least.



fuck.

fin.

drive


music: techno bass crew - love theme from bass machine
volume: 10


this group playing is really weird...i discovered them searching for speaker test sound files...but they use simulated basslines that are very challenging to reproduce through a speaker system. i haven't analyzed it thoroughly but i'm pretty sure there are things that go subsonic (<20Hz....for most people) that are only there to rumble your nasal cavities :) i actually haven't taken it home and put it on my dad's subwoofer nor my car's sub....but i've tried it on my stereo and on my headphones and neither can keep the bass lines up to a good volume level....gotta remember to put these on a cd sometime.

either way, the purpose of this post was to talk about this new driver i downloaded for my nvidia card (video card) that's....really impressive. it supports multiple desktops and multiple displays...it's a lotta fun. remember when i had that laptop? i had it connected to this monitor so i could extend my desktop to this monitor. well now i can have multiple desktops and i can just toggle between them. the one thing i can't quite do yet is get any kind of notification between desktops when a window is active (i.e. an IM makes the button in the taskbar blink). not sure if i even CAN do that...or if i want to. we'll see. i was just cruising through some windows updates because i finally have a legit version of XP (thanks austin) and found this. good deal.

i've done a satisfactory amount of work on my project for tonight. tomorrow i'll get down to the nitty gritty shit and really start designing this bad boy. it could go smoothly...or horribly, horribly wrong :) i love it.


mmm...spacemen...hey christian, remember these guys? we saw them in atlanta at that rave. i still love these guys.


trancemission

for posterity (and a changing of the guard)


music: linkin park - part of me
volume: 8


The Firephile: how the hell do you CRACK a fuckin' dildo?!
The Firephile: good lord, girl
cracKerrific: I dropped it in the shower
cracKerrific: I'm an idiot
cracKerrific: it was my first waterproof one
The Firephile: oh god
The Firephile: can i PLEASE quote that?
cracKerrific: the first time I tried it, I dropped it and it cracked against the tile
cracKerrific: umm, sure why not
The Firephile: nice

funfun

new dream blob


music: finch - *shrugs*
volume: 8

trailing thought


music: linkin park - breaking my habits
volume: 8


i thought of something i meant to blog yesterday. i went on a quick blade through riverside yesterday (up to 125th to the riverwalk, down to 96th, under the highway and back up riverside/b'way) to work off a bit of anxiety and hangover...and when i was blading up one of the hills in riverside there were leaves all over the path. as i bladed by them my draft would drag leaves after me for a few seconds before they settled again and i kept thinking one of the fat little squirrels were following me for some reason 'cause it made the same sound as them scurrying through the dead leaves in the bushes.

put a smile on my face :) hope it does you too as wel.



*squirrel nibbling*

love


music: reel big fish - victory of peter bones
volume: 18


reading through old emails i found this surf article that christian sent me a while ago (yeah...i just got to it, sorry dude, heh heh. i have this aversion to going to links people send me...but i get to them eventually). either way, it's a short article on surfing and the upcoming van's triple crown in hawaii....a three part surf competition on three of the meanest walls of water on earth (including pipe). either way, the article drifted into talk about the thirteen year old girl (hamilton) who got all but four inches of her right arm bitten off by a 14 ft. tiger shark off kaua`i. she was out of bed in two days and you watch, she'll be back in the water.

either way, just reading the article gave me that butterfly feeling in my stomach...aching for my trip home this christmas. it's only been a few months but i missed home the moment my parents dropped me off at the airport to come back to school. if i had known the effect surfing would have on me a few years before...i probably wouldn't have worked hard enough to get here :) interesting thought...i wish i were a better surfer...but i'm glad things happened the way they did. i've got a lifetime of dawn patrols and pau hana sessions ahead of me....but we usually only get one chance to get the right edumacation.

i still remember the last wave i caught before i left the beach for the last time this past summer. probably not the biggest wave i've caught, but possibly the most powerful (different beach). it was breaking right on top of me and a guy behind me took the left....in a split second decision i decided to catch it backside (right, away from the other guy) right as the crest was coming down.....i just needed one or two paddles to keep it from running over me and i popped up in a snap and let it fly. i was going so fast that it made this sound under my board like i was cruising OVER the ripples in the water instead of cutting through them like usual...shows how fast i was going (the skegs create some lift). i couldn't even get back to the shoulder 'cause it shot me so far out so fast (i suck) but that drop was the cleanest i'd ever attacked.....and that was that 'last wave' i was waiting for. i rode it most of the way in and paddled the rest of the way with a smile on my face and a heavy heart.

let's see if i can ever concentrate today now....hah




aloha

registered


music: less than jake - rainbow connection
volume: 18


M - 4:10-6:40pm - Sound and Hearing (biomedical engineering)
T/R - 12-1:05pm - Elementary Japanese
T - 6:50-9:20pm - Music Signal Processing
??? - Embedded Systems (EE design lab)

that's 11.5 credits...hahaha. i think i'm gonna take some entrepraneurship class pass/fail or something. sounds like fun. yoga was full even five minutes into my registration....fuckers. this load is gonna be a bitch as it is...but hey, it's senior year.


baboom

fin


music: neil sedaka - breaking up is hard to do
volume: 11


a friend of mine wrote in my senior year book, "stop breaking girls' hearts." it seems that's all i can do...*sigh*



air

stomach


music: jack johnson - rodeo clowns
volume:13


i've had this disgusting feeling in my body all day now...fuckin' job hunting. i finally got down to doing all the maintenance type stuff on my life that i've been meaning to do for a while. cleared up a credit card problem, workin' on a medical insurance problem from a fuckin' year ago, got my schedule organized which helped me get me resume almost-up-to-date, and started the job hunting routine.

and by the time i was done with all that i felt so drained and depressed i just kinda sat around. i called my parents, that was nice to talk to them. haven't called in a while :( i'm a bad son. either way, things back home are lookin' pretty good. christmas is lining up, my brother and sister wwill be there for christmas....and my dog misses everyone :) buuuuut after i hung up, my stomach felt like it was about 200 pounds again...or however you wanna imagine that 'dead weight' feeling. i dunno. i guess just thinking that intensely on my future after not spending ANY time doing it was a bit too much. the dice are in motion, though. just gotta give it a little more time and effort to see what rolls up to my doorstep. or...suitestep. wait. i have a door. *shakes head*

that paragraph to the left there is burning in flames at the moment. in two days i've gotten TWO expressions of distaste for my blog. for two entirely different reasons...interesting. kind of a bummer, but less of a bummer than having those thoughts unheard. again, and i can't express this enough, if something's bothering you about what i write, i'll stop. just let me know.

i'm in a foul mood. hoping to drink it off tonight.



bird.

boot


music: chet baker/gerry mulligan - my funny valentine (w/ vocals)
volume: 19


jesus christ i was drunk last night. haha. we had a fo'tees party at eric's place as a pseudo birthday party for b.white. i darnk two fo'tees there....then we headed to k'nets (don't remember getting there, don't remeber buying, but i DO remember eating...i think...)...don't remember leaving k'nets but went to amcaff. i remember being at amcaff...drank some beer and just got SO tired. there were quite a lotta people there...but i don't remember specifics very well at all.

i eventually left with dave (i don't know if he was even drinking....) and booted my slice of koronets on a tree on amsterdam. that was unfortunate. felt a lot better after that, though : ) then slept....forever. (i just got up for the second time).


good times, good times. i hope b.white had a good time 'cause i don't really remember.



weeee!

weird


music: dispatch - water stop (aka one fell swoop)
volume: 21


it seems like AGES ago that i posted that last one....but that was only yesterday.. funny. i endd up pulling about a 15 hr. work day yesterday (about 8am-11pm when my pset was due)....but i finished most of that late pset, lots of that crazy lab, got a ten minute nap...and managed to stay up 'till 4am anyway....dumbass.

slept a good deal, though. i was gonna go to signals at nine thirty...but i got up and convinced myself that was useless. that's the last class i have to find my midterm grade for...oops. i'll get it eventually.

i really have nothing to say. i just felt like telling you i was alive :) plans tonight: ultimate pickup at baker, quick beer run, fo'tees pregame at eric's for brian's, amcaff probably.....then some niiiiiice loooooong sleeeeeeeep



i really gotta start some work early this weekend. and start lookin' for a fuckin' job.



innie.

*flaps wings*


music: ataris - *shrugs*
volume: 8


so i've been trying to get a plane tickte for a good part of tonight....and i keep getting fucked. these search engines keep pumping out a few great deals on this delta flight....but thenw hen i try and buy them it says it's FULL! fuckin' bullshit man. why the hell's it comin' up on this search, teasing me with three hundred dollar savings...when it's fucking FULL!? grrrr.

i may have found another deal, off traveljungle....but with that one i have to wait at most two hours to see if it went through. the last one didn't...but that was delta as well. this one's on america west....maybe i'll have better luck.

always an adventure. i can taste the salt already...*shakes head, smiling*



i think i'll sleep a little more while i wait.




crash

settle


music: jimmy's chicken shack - high (computer file)
volume: 20


today, on my way home from my one and only monday class (albeit a 2hr. 40min. once a week class) around seven, i came to the realization that i'm not the young die hard i used to be. i slept about seven hours last night....and got lots (but broken) sleep at dave's house on saturday night...and i was SO tired before, during, and after class. my muscles are still all fucked up as well. one of my quads was about to go on sunday...good thing coach didn't play me much. (he kept starting me, then quickly tapering off my playing time....but i was okay with that 'cause i wasn't plannin' on playin' much anyway).

so yeah. i guess i started feeling it last year...but i can't do this anymore. i used to need only a few hours of sleep to go on badass study binges for three days at a time sleeping 3 hour spurts when i needed them (if even that)....but now i just get tired so much faster. there's a SMALL possibility, that i wont' be able to test 'till next year, that the shit i'm studying just sucks and that's why i can't engage myself (imagining whirley engage his knee brace at udel all weekend, hah)....but i have a sickening feeling that that may not be it. i'm falling dangerously far behind in some of my classes....and not just the work...'cause i still don't give a shit about that...but my midterms were just short of disasterous...but i still got by somehow. getting by of course reinforces my laziness 'cause i hate most of these classes...but if i continue this way i may forget how to engage when it matters.

or i could just get a goddamn job and stop worrying about it and enjoy my senior year. huh. either way, i think i'm going to make a conscious effort to drift into a NORMAL sleeping schedule....after....this week of course (see below). after all, i actually have a reason to be going to bed when at least one other person is now *wink*.


does that mean i'll blob less? i mean shit...i'd say there's QUITE a chunk of my blobs written while the rest of the world is cuddling with their teddies.



vibrato

fucked list


music: engima - rivers of belief (music vid)
volume: 22


this week's gonna SUCK....somehow it sounds like everyone is:

- microfab pset (due today...no real due date though...probably not gonna happen)
- data structures pset from hell (due tuesday no more late days...so confused)
- electronics pset from hell (due tuesday...extended 'till wednesday 11pm)
- microwave lab writeup from hell (due wednesday...a friend took ten hours on it)
- signals pset...no clue (due thursday)

- party (b.white's b.day. try not to die)
- work friday? who knows.
- find job for graduation. due now.

hope you were lookin' forward to some procrastinatory blob reading :) 'cause it'll be comin' to a theater near you in three...two...one...



*click* (like those old school black and white movie things they snap closed to start a scene)

fuck yeah


music: jack johnson
volume: 4


so, we fuckin' WON DELAWARE. 7-0 for the weekend baby, four yesterday and three today....so pretty. i don't know if any team EVER had any lead on us this weekend...but if they did they definitely didn't hold it for very long. so hot.

my back held out too.

but i sprained my ankle....and kept playing....hah! it's a light sprain, i should be okay in a bit...'specially since this was our last tournament.

now i have two weak ankles (the other one's been slightly sprained but just hasn't healed).

i'm pretty wasted...my quad was about ready to go but luckily it didn't give.


and my bed is made....that never happens....




na na na

yay


music: alien ant farm - tia lupe
volume: 2


first post from MY computer back from the dead, patched against worms, and back online. yay!!!


i'd forgotten how fast this thing is....amazing. three years later it's still awesome, glad i put the money down for good shit.


blading in a bit for the first time in fuckin' FOREVER.....i really should more. it's good for my back.



light :)

the joy of q-tips


music: jack johnson
volume: 7


so i haven't had any q-tips in a while...and none'a the boys have any either (that they keep in the bathroom) for me to steal...so i've been cleaning my ears with rolled up wads of kleenex....so unsatisfactory. so of course i run out of kleenex too through two colds two weeks apart...fuckers. but NO MORE! i have kleenex AND q-tips and can shove them little cardboard sticks as far into my noggin as i like. i always imagine what a horrible life it would be if we couldn't enjoy that scratching-an-itch feeling of giving our ears a nice, ear-drum busting ear cleaning once in a while with a wad of cotton on a stick. i mean really...could you imagine being a dog and getting ticks in your ears with no appendages or tools to scratch 'em?

i think that's what happens to bad people when they die. they get ticks in their ears and q-tips go up in flames on any human contact.

heh heh...i can make little torches.



odd mood

*gunshot*


music: linkin park - papercut (music vid)
volume: 29


Nephratari 1: ok, i take it back, i do hate you.

Auto response from The Firephile: useless!

Nephratari 1: ben also
The Firephile: NOOOOO!!!!!
The Firephile: i'm sorry!
The Firephile: want me to take it off?
Nephratari 1: heh nah
The Firephile: grrrr


sun

round two!


music: tori amos - crucify amos (music vid)
volume: 25


ben berger and i:

bigmac137: THEY ARE MAKING PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN 2!!!!
bigmac137: Johnny Depp and Keira Knightly are in it also!!!
bigmac137: comes out in 05
The Firephile: no fuckin' shit : )
The Firephile: haha
The Firephile: that's so hot
bigmac137: I just saw it on IMDB.com
The Firephile: maybe captain jack sparrow will return to the halloween party once again
bigmac137: heh....
bigmac137: Get amanda's sister to dress up at Keira Knightly
The Firephile: lol
The Firephile: hahahaha!
bigmac137: she just has to put on a Corset
The Firephile: she'll be eighteen then!!!!!

fin


i'm pretty sure this is where amanda shoots me.

on another not, interesting discovery. i've been spelling monica belucci with BELUSHI....mixing up her last name with john belushi...oops. if you don't remember, i commented a few posts ago about how many hits i was getting on google searches on 'monica belushi'....goes to show i'm not the only fuckin' idiot out there : ) score! i get a lotta those actually. for a long time i was getting hits off 'penopticon' 'cause i ddin't know it was spelled 'panopticon'. my friend drew thought i was actually making a pun....the 'panopticonic journal' so to speak (sticking a PEN in there...'cause i'm writing my panopticon). turns i'm not nearly that clever....in fact, maybe just that foolish :) i've gotten a few other hits off mispellings that were pretty comical....so weird.



rain

matrix is done.


music: victor wooten - bass solo on norwegian wood
volume: 27


so i saw the matrix just now...and here's the entire plot, and the entire point of the matrix. and no it's not a spoiler.







basically the wachowski brothers wanted to make a movie to show the world HOW FUCKING HOT monica belushi is. i mean...holy shit. how important a character is she? NOTHING would've made sense without her....they would never have found the keymaker, we never would've heard that ultimately useless monologue by the dumb white boy with a pen, and we never would've heard a hundred neo's say "holy shit". what a boring movie that would've made. and then this movie...i can't even remember what she says in her five minute appearance 'cause i was staring at her enormous breasts and sweet, supple lips. why couldn't she be agent smith. that would've made a better movie. i'm gonna make a movie. and agent smith is gonna be monical belushi. and she's going to shoot everyone in the kneecaps. even the robots....'cause they must have some sort of knee....actually the sentinals have about a thousand knees don't they. but really...who's boobs are bigger.

i have to watch brotherhood of the wolf again...except i just have to fast forward through the parts where the stupid motherfucker takes his arm out of his corsett...how the fuck do you spell that.

so yeah, go see the matrix and stare at her tits, 'cause that's all the movie's about. miss that and you're just going to have to watch it again 'cause nothing's gonna make any sense. the matrix was made solely for her to be god fuckin' BEAUTIFUL.



on another note, i went to the trash chute this morning to trash something and there was music coming out of. that made me really happy :) some eighties hip hop with a monotone keyboard back melody and some dude chanting 'pump up the volume'.



monica belushi is definitely hotter than me.

and there must've been duct tape involved.



supple

halloween pics


music: tool - aenema
volume: 17


here's some pics stolen from catherine's website...mostly of yours truly ;) click on them for bigger versions.




1) yaaaarrr, matey. it's CAPTAIN jack sparrow!




2) you will always remember this as the day that Captain Ridiculous ALMOST captured captain jack sparrow!




3) corey and whirley as me and candace, respectively. fuckers.




4) me and the lovely mini-muppet, aka becca....post go-go-gadget jess.getsexier();




5) put some clothes on that slut....



enjoy!

up for the weekend


music: Crystals - "then he kissed me"
volume: 17


heh heh, so we just got back from atlantic citya nd i have some mild allergic reaction to shrimp for some reason.. that's never happened before. either way, i left with $100 in my wallet for EVERYTHING....gambling, food, gas, hotel. i hit it pretty big on the slots and came home with $180 in my wallet....after paying for everything too!

it's actually pretty sad considering 'hit it pretty big' meant winning $200 on ONE pull on the slots. i was psyched. 800 quarters is a shitloada' quarters man. but i kept going back and slowly it dwindled down. i think i spent maybe 40-50 bucks on stuff other than gambling, so i lost 70 of it back that i could've walked away with, whatever. i came back with more than i went with...so it's kind of like getting free food, free sleep, free fun, and then some. shweet.

i never even got to the poker tables. i was winning on slots all night...going up 50 bucks and down 20 or so....and then when i hit it big i'm like...hell...why should i play poker when this is working? i also hadn't even played poker witda boys in quite a while so i wasn't really 'in the zone' and didn't wanna risk it. i've also spent LOT of money this weekend....i wasn't planning on losing more.

i started just lending my money to some of the other peeps we were with (dave, liu, chang, sai, judy, raj, don, rubes) so that i wouldn't spend it...worked out nicely (i still have to collect, though, but at least i didn't gamble it : ) next time, next time...when my wallet isn't bleeding from a halloween party. i definitely like gambling....but right now i'm just a little too tight with my money (mostly 'cause i really don't care about it most of the time and end up spending way too much).

AND WE STILL HAVE ANOTHER DAY OF VACATION!!!!...god knows i should work some....or rest some...but i'll probably end up drinking instead.



talk to me



*beep*

losing my religion....if by religion you mean money


music: mixed cd - incubus - pardon me
volume:8


we're waiting for raj to show up so we can head out to atlantic city...first time for me. it's interesting being twenty one now where all ths shit is actually legal. i might not even gamble, but it still sounds like fun. maybe black jack? if they have low enough poker tables i'll hit it up, but i kind of doubt they do. casinos don't make money off low stakes poker....

i woke up early this morning to do laundry because i absolutely had NO clean socks or boxers. i was using just random shorts i had as underwear for a while, and mismatched socks (that feels really weird btw, having two socks that feel different...) but i figured this would be a good reason to get some clean undies. gotta' look like money ;) just saw swingers on the bus last weekend coming back from UMASS.

my parents absolutely love going to vegas. they don't even gamble all that much. my mom plays some slots...and roulette. she really does has a lotta luck, it's funny. the first time they went i suggested that she play roulette 'cause i thought she'd have a lotta fun doing it...and she did...and she won...she was playing low stakes but she won like a hundred bucks or something and came home and gave me a twenty, that was nice of her :) i WOULD like to play poker at a casino....but i just really don't have the money to do that right now. my banking's all fucked up 'cause i thought i did something that i didn't and now i have to wait for it to go through and and and....meh. the funny thing is that because of that i have a shitload'a money in my bank account (which shoulda' payed off some'a my credit card)....maybe i should leave my atm card home...hah.

i'm still pissed off that i bought all that beer that one drunken night and don't remember it (forty five bucks) and drank like TWO beers out of that and got no money back. i figure at some point i'd learn my lesson...or get mad...but no, i go and spend another 100 bucks on this party and don't get anything back.

i'm done with that for a while. i'm just gonna bring a flask and let everyone else worry about it.



yeah i'm just rambling 'cause raj isn't here yet. we could technically go without him (dave's driving as well) but it's not like we're really in a rush. just....in a rush to lose our money : ) hah. dave's getting restless as well....he's talking to himself and skipping around.

i think i'm too relaxed right now to think of anything interesting to blob. sorry to waste your time :) that smile's there 'cause i'm really lying. i just like hearing myself talk.



jaws

party parTY PARTY blob.


music: none, movie in the lounge, loud
volume: distant


so i think last night was quite the fuckin' party. i was really dissappointed that i didn't get more time to do shit to make it a little more intersting, but in the end it seems like costumes and a garbage can full of jungle juice did the trick...

six cartons of juice (fruite punch and orange/cranberry, three each)
five cans of pineapple chunks
about ten sour granny smith apples
two and a half bottles of ginger ale
two bottles of 151

i let the pineapples and apples soak in about a 1:1 ratio of juice and 151...for about an HOUR. as party time closed, i slowly added the rest, and finally added JUST enough ice to make it cold so's not to dilute it too much. thinking abck i probably should've put another load of ice in there about halfway through....oh well. i'll just remember that for next time.

me and dave bought 120 beers up at flair's, a deverage distributor up at 207th that fuckin' ROCKED. 15 bucks for 30 packs of bud. maverick and garrett brought another 36, corey brought 12 natties i think, and white brought 18, so we had close to 190 beers last night...and i think we have 15 left. jungle juice is gone....and someow we've gained 2/3 bottle of scotch, a few ounces of rum, and 2/3 of a fifth of seagram's 7. i think i'll claim that. ALL of that...since i spent 100 bucks and haven't gotten shit back yet. still deciding how i feel about that.

but yeah, as i hoped, people brought people, but not too many people. we took the big table out of the lounge eventually as people were just tripping on it...that made a lot more space....and the place filled. at one point lesser was makin' out with some girl she'd just met on my couch with the door closed...that's crap.....if you're gonna use someone's room fuckin' ask. she had the door closed and i was like, no way. my room's the closest so i guess it's the obvious choice but i was going in and out a lot to grab various things all night. so i sent them to austin's room! and they fuckin' LOCKED the door. that's even more shit. but hey, at least austin gets two lesbians on his futon....hah.

and then there was steiner and eunji....which is absolutely no secret anymore so here it is, for you. at some point steiner (i assume) just jumped on a very drunk eunji and they were goin' at it hardcore on the sofa in our lounge. there were apparently a lotta crotch shots taken as eunji had a thong on under a grass skirt and a coconut bra. i finaly gave in and told them to go in my room but to STAY on the couch and not even touch my bed. they did. but i did find an empty condom wrapper on the ground on my way to bed at dawn.....good form steiner! we still have no idea why he had a condom. a black one, nonetheless.

best costume, me. and by me i mean corey, who dressed up as me. he walked in with a giant fro wig, uptown local sweatshirt, red surfshorts and my clown shoes on. he eventually lost the sweater which was even more apt. i felt so privelaged, i appeared twice at a party. and to top it off, brian white came as a hula girl with a long black wig. he was candace. that bitch (white.) that bitch (candace) actually did show up. i said about...three words to her maybe. maybe two to matt. pain.

i have no idea how many people we had here. i was going to make an attempt to start meeting people but yeah, that didn't happen. i was having enough fun with the peeps i did know. and about halfway through the night i started having LOTSA fun with the muppets :) amanda's little sister becca's in town for the weeeknd and came to our party. for those of you don't know (i'm sure she'll end up reading this at some point), becca's 16 years old and has the rack of a pornstar, and a more than cute face and body to match. either way, she seemed to like hanging with me, and at some point implied that i wouldn't wear her skimpy slut skirt. so i took her challenge and we came into my room and stripped naked and switched costumes.

actually i stripped down my boxers and went outside while she changed into mine; i dont' think she actually woulda' minded but the big muppet would've and i thought it was the 'right' thing to do (yeah yeah, shaddup). so we switched...apparently i look pretty good as a woman. my shoulders are pretty wide so the sleeves were pretty much up my armpits showing off my guns, and the skirt was short enough to JUST cover my package....i had my boxers on but rolled 'em up so you couldn't see them. i kept telling people i had nothing on..which i almost went with but i thought i'd spare the world from seeing more naked jess. especially the way i was dancing :) i eventually found becca's fishnet stockings as well which held the boxers up much better and just made me THAT-MUCH-SEXIER.

i crack myself up.

by the end of the night, when most people left, i FINALLY allowed quarters to happen when i was assured that the party was a success. *sigh*. i wasn't really complaining since i had two beautiful women to cuddle with on a couch not made for it (heh heh, sweet). we finished the pineapples and eventually they dozed off....i had to wake them up when finally everyone else was gone, the movie had stopped, and i was just bored and unable to sleep. so i finally took off the women's clothes and went to sleep just as the sun was coming up......ALONE *sob*. haha. in eric's words i really do just have to seal the deal at some point. i hear on his blog, which i haven't read 'cause i refuse to guess his goddamn password and he won't tell me...fucker. either way he said he loses repect for any woman who's attracted to me because they're just not going to get anywhere. that's rather unfortunate since for the first time in a while i kind of DO wanna get somewhere. funny how nothing ever goes as planned in our lives ;) but really. she's still sixteen. and i thought it was all in good fun on her part as well. or i'm just trying not to get my hopes up ;)

hey becca, gimme a call in two years, heh heh. or....tomorrow?

muppet's gonna kill me. or her. or both.

it was a fun night. got some drink. slapped some ass. well...slapped lots of ass (what else is a plastic pirate's sword for?), grabbed lots of ass too as well. got naked. got dragged. got cuddled. got my package felt up. got freaked. got bit. got nipple pinched....and then got insomnia. i kept waking up all morning...it sucked. i finally got up for a while before noon with a splitting headache...i don't really think it was a hangover since i was close to sober by the time i went to bed....i had headache before the party as well....but yeah i couldn't sleep. slept a bit more after some breakfast and cleaned up a lot with the help of others. thanks guys! and then went to see scary movie three with my sis this evening after sitting around here watching 'goonies' and 'the burbs'. good day. useless! besides the cleaning.

and i still have fake dreads ;) a lotta people were lookin' at me funny. i've decided i'm going to play ultimat elike this from now on. pretty much everything i had on last night...minus the eye liner...taht could get irritating.

i'll blob more if i remember. please, comment any hilarity i forgot :)

to all you punks who missed the party, your loss. you missed one HOT drag queen.



arggg